Tag Archives: “libertarians”

Like Having Sex With a Republican

11 Jan

Want to feel intense boredom and self-hatred at the same time?

Call Ron Paul a racist on Twitter and then engage in “conversation” with the Paulbots who come out of the woodwork to defend him.

They’re RELENTLESS and, I swear, they have a script. The same dumb, dumb, entitled white dude script.  I’d compare them to Mormons, but that seems unfair. Mormons are a LOT more entertaining.

GAAAAAAAAAAHAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRG!

2 Aug

Teabaggers are such stupid-ass ignorant mendacious douchebags. My favorite (and by “favorite,” I mean “causes me to raise my voice about 6 octaves and yell incoherently”) is when they whine about being called names.

Jesus help me. I wish I were to the point where I didn’t give a fuck and just thought it was funny.

It’s Empirically Proven!

26 Jul

When you cut taxes for big business, they pass those savings on to the consumer.

I Give Up

18 Apr

Y’all can stop fighting over who’s going to take me to Atlas Shrugged Part One the First Part because Ed’s review told me everything I needed to know.* It sounds horribly painful. And not in a fun way.

Scoregasm called it with the comparison to Battlefield Earth, although this movie is clearly worse. Obviously, I am not tough enough for it, as I was incapable of watching Battlefield Earth for more than twenty minutes before I had to turn it off for fear that I would have a brain aneurysm. And that shit was in space. I fucking love space!

I don’t think it’s even worth watching in hopes that I can make hilarious (to me) jokes about it. I can already tell that it is so mind-suckingly awful that it would be like wading into Freeperville, and only the best alchemists can turn that kind of shit into comedic gold (see also and also, too). Needless to say, I am not one of them, and if turning thirty has taught me anything, it’s to accept my limitations. I sadly admit defeat.

*No need to thank me for the immense amount of traffic my blog will provide, Ed. No, really. The pleasure’s mine.

TANGENTIALLY RELATED UPDATE: I hate people who take a dump in a public restroom and don’t have the courtesy to stick around for ten seconds and take the responsibility for a second (or third) flush when it’s needed. Nobody wants to see your fecal leavings. WHO IS JOHN GALT?

I Didn’t Know There Were TWO Parts!

14 Apr

Or three? I suppose that speech could be a whole fucking movie in and of itself. It would be boring, but that’s not particularly different from the way I imagine the rest of the movie(s) will be.

Anyway, who wants to get completely fucked up and see this movie with me? I’ll sneak in the candy if you bring the whiskey.

UPDATE: Oh, snap. It isn’t even playing here. I am NOT driving to St. Louis.

Fuck You, Substance. I’d Rather Talk about Santorum (Either the Guy or the Frothy Mixture)

4 Apr

Over at Substance’s house, he indicates that some “libertarian” over at Big Hollywood is all cranky poo because C****** S**** called Sarah Palin a whore.

Of course, (as Substance points out), it’s quite ridiculous and hypocritical to be all fainty-couchy at S**** for using the word “whore” after he has shot his girlfriend, abused and threatened TWO WIVES to the point that they had to get restraining orders, and committed a variety of other shit-ass acts against women (and I’m sure those are just the tip of the iceberg).

But I actually think it’s worse than that; it’s the way that this type of rhetoric influences and reinforces the way that women are perceived in our society.  It’s not just that they’re using it as a tool to go after political enemies. It’s that they believe that certain women deserve respect and certain women are subhuman garbage.  It’s a rightwing distillation of the attitude that Anna Holmes talks about in this article–certain women are worthy of protection by virtue of who/what they are, and certain women are just disposable, or even deserve what they get. It’s actually funny how you can see something backwards and fucked up in society and pretty much guarantee that conservatives practice it to a greater degree than pretty much anyone.

Of course, the difference between these two groups is always changing. While there are women (and, fuck, GIRLS) who are almost always going to be unsympathetically viewed, even the criteria for what makes one a victim vs. what means you’ve asked for it is impossible to pin down, no matter how close to normative you are. It’s something that Sarah Palin types don’t see, but will one day understand. The Big P only shines favor on you when you are its lapdogs and follow its dictates, but, like any abusive relationship, the rules can change from one day to the next.  In the end, it’s more about who you are than what you do. As long as you’re favored, you have some wiggle room, but the moment you step over the invisible line (sometimes through no fault of your own), you are just as vulnerable as the rest of us. It’s currently very easy for Sarah Palin to dismiss sexism against her as her political enemies being assholes (which they are), but someday–when her looks fade, most likely–she will learn that she’s just a woman like the rest of us.

Although she’ll never admit it’s because of the systems she’s supported all her life, of course.